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I have to stop.

I need to breath. 

There’s so many conflicting thoughts and emotions that at times I can hardly believe my eyes as I move from place to place. 

These spaces are so unfamiliar, they are too unfamiliar.

If I’m lucky this autumn nostalgia will calm my thoughts and ease the speed of my beating heart.

I know exactly how I wound up here, and I know exactly where it’ll end. 

This never ending cycle of cat and mouse is just not for me.

Im a cat pretending to be a mouse, a wolf pretending to be a sheep.

I need to stop.

I have to breath.

I am yearning for peace. I crave stability.

These people are so unfamiliar, too unfamiliar.

Principles of population tell me, that they’re stuck in a cycle of misery and happiness, believing that a one track mind will end in self improvement.

They don’t know what they want, and they don’t know what they're doing but yet they want me. 

If I’m lucky I can ignore it. I can fall so deeply in love with myself that the attention from others means nothing.

But I cannot do what has already been done. 

I’ve already stopped and taken my breaths. 

The days have become more clear as the leaves turn shades and begin to drop.

These places and these people are more transparent to me than they will ever know. 

I am lucky to have found my way by maintaining my peace and stability. 

I am lucky to have held onto my memories.

I was never pretending to be anything. 

There are two sides to me. Probably more.

Which side do you know?